the beds are so narrow its like a jenga threesome
Funny thing- my attraction to each one is inversely proportional to his level of availability.
Also do the "tongue the pee-hole" thing.
You never realize how many sex toys you have until you have to strategically hide them while moving out of your dorm.
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It was like a lincoln log. Seriously. I don't know who's more pissed, me or my vagina...worst.hookup.ever.
im not sure. I kicked him in the ear last night trying to kick a plastic cup off his head to prove I can kick higher than anyone.
you should be careful. everyone knows your chances of pregnancy increase by 100 percent when youre the daughter of a religious figure
I guess I really am the only person in this world who can successfully have a no-strings-attached threesome on the beach.
He started screaming "fuck me I'm Ryan Gosling" and proceeded to pick up the smallest guy at the party and carry him to bed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just replaced the poop spray with an air horn... Now we wait!
I just had to take a picture of someone whose testicles are bigger than my fists combined. Living the dream.
The amount of drugs I did this weekend make me concerned about my health but at the same time fascinated to see if I could do more
Last night he told me I was never sexier than when I was cutting pizza. Seriously. Like, he's perfect.
The last time I saw you, you were giving the stripper a lap dance.
Omg worst high ever. I'm watching Parks and Rec, and all i can think about is how andy, leslie, and tom are my closest friends. Forever alone.
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