Bar closing I am hiding in the bathroom. do you think anyone will find me?
I believe that I finger-banged my way to the top of the corporate ladder.
is wine microwaveable?
i just bought weed at the top of a mountain, best decision of our lives to go to school in colorado.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she was like the girl next door.. if you lived next door to a whorehouse
The lego bong didn't work. Just made us look stupid
you dipped you banana in queso last night.
he just used "boss" and "boner" in the same sentence. I cant respond.
A few days ago I apparently came up, asked her to make me soup, and handed her a can of coconut milk.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I might be offended if you don't bang me tomorrow. You know, for America.
SCUSE ME I KNOW YOU DIDNT DO THAT MUCH COKE IN 10 MINUTES
I deleted all traces of him from my phone
even the dick picks he sent you?
no are you nuts? saved that shit to my camera roll
Why is there a waffle in the knife drawer?
The real question is why are there knives in the waffle drawer.
He wanted to save my dignity, I just wanted beads and jäger
Idk if you've ever tried hysterically crying in the shower listening to Florence + The Machine but it's honestly a life-affirming experience
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