none of my boyfriends are responding right now, I thought I had enough to avoid this problem
Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
I'm home alone watching The Hills seasons, eating pickles and drinking straight rye. I just googled "how to make friends". Probably not the most pro-active solution. Help.
honey bunches of taint.
Its only tuesday and I need a dd home from work. This is getting too easy.
The straight man in me wants to hit on her. But the gay man in me wants to compliment her on her awesome outfit.
I remember desperately screaming that I love my life and running in zig zags all the way home
I would compare it to a jeffrey but in smoothie form. More drugs in here than Bobby Brown's sock drawer.
Nope, sorry. Already took my bra off. All down hill from here. My next act will be crying, singing, and eating girl scout cookies in the shower. You can come watch the shit show though.
The best part of last night was the women's softball game on the TV at the strip club
I got Pilsbury cinnamon rolls for us to have tomorrow, but I don't have the willpower to leave them in my fridge overnight, so I am eating them all and getting us more in the morning
I love you more by the minute
You think you're smart. You're pretending to be asleep to save yourself from my hormonal pms mood swings. Unfortunately that only works against bears.
I raged so hard that I was so hungover today I threw up out of a car window going 50mph cause my parents didn't pull over quick enough ...sorry to the people behind us
If there's a nuclear war you can come over. I'll feed you soup and you can rig up car batteries to power the coffee pot and toaster. We can grow tomatoes and chickens.
Mandatory face masks - finally, a solution for lip augmentation failures and bad breath.
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