It's more exciting when they aren't single....and even better when you have to pretend that you just slept with their roommate while trying to do the walk a shame as their girlfriend comes marching into the apt.
Im not the least bit jealous of the life you lead.
well we can cross tagging a chick in a movie theatre off the list of things to do before we die
I was actually kinda bummed my STD test came back negative.
That would have been proof he'd slept with the stripper. Lame.
i failed horribly. studying for that final was as pointless as Vinnie is to Jersey Shore
And the cops told us we were all naked.
You told me you were allowed to keep eating butter because it had just passed midnight and you were on the next day's daily fat servings
My night sucks. It's really hard to masturbate with a broken finger.
I mostly enjoyed dancing with him because his boner was scratching my bug bites.
How bad would it be if I wore out the dress we got peed on in. You're the only one who knows.
I just came so hard my hamstring felt like it was going to tear. I am also now a screamer
Are there edibles for sale in the Denver airport because if so bring those to my mouth
Is it appropriate to send an apology gift to his roommates for breaking the bathroom sink during crazy sex?
My hands smell like penis... I can't even remember the last time i touched a penis, but my hands say i did. Oh the mystery.
This is the Front Desk Lady from the Saturolite Inn. Your friend is passed out in the lobby. Please come help her.
tell me about the eggs
Randomize
