Where you are. You must stay where you are are
Where you are. You must stay where you are arewhere are youu
Where you are. You must stay where you 5eare wher are you!!
Do I have a sign around my neck that says "SWM desperately seeking ultra-plus-size woman that likes everything I do"? I swear they're organized
No, but you do have a sign around your neck that says "Free cupcakes."
Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
I overheard a kid saying to his mom at Walmart: "Mommy.. should we buy cups for daddy's spit?"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We couldn't even have sex we were both laughing so hard. I don't know how I feel about the quality of that weed.
Awesome morning. I just met my boyfriend's wife, should I have shaken her hand or was the hug a tad over the top?
I couldn't function. I was to the point where I was using a bottle cap as a monocle.
dude, I feel like I need to get my gf's roommate a gift. something that says, sorry you walked in on me getting blown. suggestions?
Vegas should really enforce the buddy system because if not everyone is going to end up swimming during the water show in front of the Bellagio.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I should have questioned it early on when they said bring beer and chocolate syrup
I'm dedicating this beer to drunk texting
I either forgot underwear this morning or lost them at work and I seriously don't know which.
The house across the street caught on fire today, Drunk people high centered their car tonight. Looking out my front window I get to watch police chases all the time. I am going to miss this place.
Unless it involves a lot of whiskey, an ACDC concert, and a guy named Juan from the Philippines, then I'm not interested.
I think I'm taking after my dog, I just want to hump everything
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