what i wouldnt give for a night at orourkes without seeing 3+people ive slept with
I'm officially my mother.. Smoking in the garage pretending to take the dog out in a big ugly jacket
My landlord wasn't pleased about the new fire pit we built him.
I'll just wear something slutty to the liquor store and hope for the best
that's your solution for everything
The tornado sirens were going off and everyone just ran to the liquor store. .
Only you would get a date out of getting hit by a car
I'm gonna take my bong and hot box the pirate ship in the daycare playground.
He had bigger boobs than me last night and we both weren't wearing a bra so it was a fair judgement
I dont know it just seems wrong to fuck her on my exes back porch
Yes, bail money means jail. It also means lie to dad, do it now.
Instead of saying hi she asked if she could touch your dick through your ski bib and NOW I understand why you wore it to the bars
Like pizza and mermaids make up about 1/3 of my thoughts on the weekends.
He's on the porch naked. Help.
The cl.oudds are foaming a really big pen.Is OMG.
You were arrested in a tiara again... maybe you shouldn’t wear one.
Randomize
