did you wind up at some random place? and do you remember face planting into the fireplace?
I an trashes at a wedding. Hotbcousins here I come. Agh.
So I just introduced myself to this guy in front of me and now he's saving my pictures on facebook to his phone..
2 am we went back to his house. his mom handed us beers and cooked us pancakes. the next morning his dad had washed my car. i lied. living at home after college definitely does not suck.
it's sunday funday. and also, who can outslut the other day.
I woke up and found 10 txts from him. All sent at 6:30 am, and all about the muffin man.
dude. you ripped the mardi gras beads off the girls neck and yelled she didnt deserve them..
It went alright, nothing too special, just got threatened with a knife by our server.
Why does my jaw hurt?
I may have punched you.
It was less of a bar, and more of an abandoned basement that some people sell booze in.
I'm serious. I have boob tassles if this is an exchange thing.
Nothing like a little chlamydia diagnosis to ring in the new year
I made him leave to get me chicken nuggets so I could have sex with his roommate
i cant hook up i'm covered in egg rolls
as a lesbian i'd like to thank joe biden and also america for giving us this absolute MILF for a VP
Randomize
