I hate you, and I hope you have babies soon that you love very much. Then I will steal them and feed them to sharks, and you will be so heart broken that you never want to have any more kids and you'll just hide out in a dark room all day wondering how someone could feed another persons babies to sharks.
Yes because finding a guy to give head to is pretty difficult.
I mean not really
Obviously that's why it was a joke you are so stupid it's impossible.
her parents were awake and in the next room. i think i deserve a big fucking medal for that orgasm.
I passed out in the VIP room and she charged me for 17 songs until I woke up, theres a bouncer asking me for $700, fuck tequila
I don't remember her name, all I remember is trying to suck the wedding ring off her finger.
hes trying to draw the periodic table on his chest with a sharpie. i'm not sure how thats going to help him on his chem final, but he keeps shouting "this is how the pros do it"
dude there is absolutely no room for a slide in our room
I have just figured that it takes exactly 2 and a half rums to clean the bathroom..
Mcdonalds hasn't even finished serving breakfast yet and u two are getting drunk?
You know it is an interesting night when the 911 operator calls you
His penis smells like laundry I just wanted to cuddle it
Drunk Jeff aka Dreff thinks he's about 3x cooler than be really is and about 100x better at dancing than he really is
I just meant the frequency of your blow jobs on a flow chart wouldn't look too promising
So I'm hiding in my bathroom smoking bowls because my landlords kids came over to visit my dog... My life has reached a new low
Vulcans are sexy now IT HAS BEEN WAY TOO LONG SINCE I'VE GOTTEN LAID
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