I think I deserve the nobel peace prize for discovering that one should smoke before drinking instead of drinking before smoking.
saw you walking with that piece of shit
and that piece of shit just read that
At this point I feel like i'm never going to be sober, and it's frightening
i threw up on the table at the pizza place and peed in her room mates closet. i wouldnt invite me back either
Because you know it would be fucking amazing to get trashed and shatter the dreams of 12 year old girls. I might get a shirt.
there is nothing like a happy birthday present when you wake up with a bow on your vagina.
Walked girl from last night to car as gf was driving up. Got slow clap from neighbors.
Indeed. The kind of morning where puking in someone's shoes is not frowned upon
When i sexted him a pic of my boobs I was worried he was going to notice the dorito crumbs and know I was just eating topless
Dad's teaching me to make moonshine this weekend as "college prep". How scared should I be sis?
I'm on A4A looking at dick pics while the CEO is on the phone trying to convince me not to leave the company
I lost my pants last night, she told me I walked into their room after leaving 5 minutes before wearing my thong.....and no pants. I have absolutely no idea where I left them.
I've had my dick out in public way too much for someone my age...
i'm high and self actualising, please send help
All my friends are going on vacations with their boyfriends while I’m over here in court trying to get a restraining order against my ex....
Randomize