oh well we may not be friends on facebook but at least i got laid
her vagina looked like a handful of raisins.
Weird. Haha. I guess taking advice from batman is a good idea.
every time I see Anne Hathaway all I can think is "my cousin fucked a guy who fucked her" and it makes me proud.... so I want to say thank you for being that cousin.
I don't want to talk about her cat for two hours only to dry hump till I'm blistered. Not worth it.
I feel like I'm on let's make a deal. should I go with what's behind bulge number 1 or bulge number 2?
I recommend you throw your keys as far as you can in one direction, your phone as far as you can in the opposite direction, and hold on.
Doing lines of coke through pieces of licorice. Because I can
Attempted to dodge my boyfriends cum last night and ended up falling off the bed and getting the worlds most painful charlie horse. fuck my life.
Why is my vagina being sacrificed for yours? I'm sure he would take a piece of you too. Your turn.
If this were a real emergency kilted men wielding claymores and riding giant badgers would hve rescued said Guinness. So clearly this is just a hypothetical
I think I caught your cold through my vagina. It was worth it.
Yes ma'am. I'm attracted to unconventional people, you know that.
True. I can't judge, half of my sexual partners I only know a false first name & a number. We all have our kinks.
You're having marijuana delivered to you. You're buying drugs and you aren't even leaving the house. I'm sure he'll be surprised if you're NOT wearing a bathrobe.
New one isn't as good asmy ex. She won't put her tongue up my butt
Peter this is your "ex"
I stand by what i said
Randomize
