Sooo i definitely have a major burn on my chin from kenny's ...stubble from making out for hours while coked up. Pure class.
She just squirted all over my face. then laughed at me and took a pic
I sent him a picture of my touching myself. He responded back "Your nails look really nice"
my boob sweat smells like rotting zombie flesh
is this your pickup line?
driving around with you guys listening to the beach boys made me very concious of how white you all are.
just had to re-breakup with her. it was like shooting a dead horse that was crying and talking.
He wasn't lying when he said he was immune to pepperspray. He pretended it burned for like 12 seconds and told the cops he was kidding he was alright. We'll be there soon.
The shit show didn't end. it just relocated itself to my apartment instead of yours.
you also need to get my treadmill fixed.
we have what I like to call an assload of ramen noodles
Do not shit in our house. There is no TP. I am walking to get more, if I do not return, I have probably died of dysentery after my last wagon wheel got stuck in a gulch. Tell Martha and Lou Ann that I love them, and that I passed away doing the Lord's work.
Ummm so I'm at the hospital and just heard some guy get tazed......twice.
Idk I'm sorry it's weird to ask for testimonials on your penis
he is sitting in the driveway by himself laughing at nothing, idk what to do
wheres my face? and why is my pocket so big?
Remember that time we were together? Yeah, I don't miss that.
Randomize
