And mexicans. My burrito likes you.
At my boss' house at a bbq. Had a few beers. Taking a poop - there's no TP...this is my nightmare.
low key just jizzed in a chinese food container
I just want you to know that were having pizza delivered to the emergency room
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she was carrying the quesadilla around the bar like a security blanket
I feel like I just need to fuck him after all his effort. like a "hey man good try" like those kids who get last place and still get a trophy.
The entire defensive line took care if me when I passed out. One of them even held my hair when I puked and the other carried me upstairs to bed. God I love football so much more now
Let's get really high and wear fake mustaches and try not to laugh at each other...
Girl, he can't tell you not to take a bump just because you work tomorrow. You're on a wedding diet, remember?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Whatever it's Canadian jail, it's not like Guatemala or something. It'll be nice and cushy and they'll probably throw him a big bday party with all his friends and strippers
After closing we did it on every flat surface in the bar. Best use a coaster if you're coming to happy hour today.
Nothing $200 worth of strippers and spicy fried chicken couldn't fix.
Under no circumstances is tits McGee to make that kind of decision about my life!
She gave me a boner for the first time in 9 years.
I'm seriously considering selling my books back early. I don't use them anyways and I could really use the beer money..
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