She thought I was gay, so I told her I'd be more comfortable with anal. She agreed.
Should study in library more often, procrasturbating is less of an option.
How much time is enough between masturbating and watching little bear?
After Sake bombs he tried to puke into an alluminum beer bottle and shot vomit streaks in a perfect V out the sides of his mouth and hit BOTH girls he had bought drinks for that night. He was like an Icon of Cock-blocking yourself.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i almost set my kitchen on fire last night. homecoming week is getting the best of me
Well this lady at the bar told me I was a natural on the tambourine and that it was my God given talent. and then she gave me a tambourine.
Totally sleeping on a bloodstained mattress tonight. I love life's little adventures.
I think we've had way too many heart to hearts in the Mc Donalds parking lot for this to be a healthy relationship
being a senior sucks, I just started embracing my inner slutty college girl, and it's almost time to put her away...for like, ever. and i really like her.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He never broke character while fucking me on the neighbor's lawn. I give him a 10 for his dedication to the British accent.
I attempted to stand up and was quickly reminded by gravity that I am the universe's bitch right now
I like the wholesome side of you
I'm so goddamned horny I could use all my pent up energy to tear a redwood out by its roots.
Come over. I've made 2 dinners and so many cocktails. I'm a 50's housewife with no family.
He made me put my cow print vest and my cowboy hat from my ' sheriff woody' costume and said I'll show you a woody. What I charmer huh!? I love make up sex
Last night a drunk chick tried to lick me. If you are trying to lick the zombies, you are too drunk for the haunted house.
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