Where you are. You must stay where you are are
Where you are. You must stay where you are arewhere are youu
Where you are. You must stay where you 5eare wher are you!!
omg this kid i'm babysitting is making a penis out of playdough ahhhh.
He just rolled me a 'baby penis' as opposed to his 'big boy' penis that he crafted...he just demanded that I roll him a penis.
Leaving terminator. dude in front of us leaving was wearing a baggy micael vick jersey, cargo shorts and brown crocs. God I hate people.
my boss just accepted "because it's 4/20" as a legitimate reason to take Friday off
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Its official the day you get back into town we are having a going away to jail party for me. My last wish before prison is to shit faced drunk with you, get into a fist fight, and then cuddle up and fall asleep. Just like old times <3
THAT FUCKER WASTED TWO OF MY COLORED CONDOMS! HE DIDN'T EVEN FUCKING FINISH IN IT HE JUST SLAPPED IT ON AND WASTED IT!
I swear to god little potato creatures live inside Belvedere bottles and claw at your throat as you swallow shots.
I'm the man of the house if we're referring to livers.
Whenever someone tells me they've never met a bisexual, I feel like a majestic fucking unicorn.
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My grandpa is driving me to get condoms and wine. This is adulthood.
DUDE I FINGERED JOE'S MOM, PLS DONT TELL HIM, MORE LATER
I'm wine drunk & this is not good news for anybody
Getting on a bus with a beer pong table. I am proof we can make this campus fun.
yeah, my mom got it for me because it had animals AND alcohol.
It’s so white trash that I almost have to have it.
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