wooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
ooooooooooooo i'm drink
Obama just said the words "we're all in this together." I wanted to start singing high school musical
i walked into the first stall,, but there was no paper, so i'm in the other one. a little kid is in the one without paper now and is making a lot of noise. curious how this'll turn out for him.
I wish alcohol would automatically work as birth control if you have sex drunk.
I may still return these pants. Depends how much they smell like alcohol by tmrw morning. I've already spilled once.
What are the signs of a concussion? Please don't freak out.
This has been the biggest binge-drinking season of the decade.
Let's just say my vagina is not superimpressed with the superintendent of schools.
where are you guys? the police just woke me up on the couch outside.
Just made out with a girl I dated in high school, and she told me her girlfriend likes me. I like where this is going.
there may have been a blood oath never to speak of it again...only reason i can think of as to why there was a 1 inch bloody cut on my right boob
We fired a shoe out of a medieval cannon. I know not where we got either one.
YALL MOTHERFUCKERS WANNA WATCH HEAVY METAL AND SMOKE WEED AND PLAY POOL AND DRINK BEER AND SMOKE WEED
Sexting just isn't as much fun once you learn how bad he is in bed...
I have beer and butt plugs...pretty sure I will find a way to entertain myself while I wait
Randomize
