planned parenthood is perfect for picking up chicks...they all put out
I'm going to appeal my grade. Is it better to look studious or slutty?
On that note; HAPPY 21: THE SEQUEL from the back of an ambulance!!
Also, your vagina needs a time out and let your brain have a chance to make decisions.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Shit dude that sort of wholesale destruction can't just be done at the drop of a hat
I never woulda thought that back in kindergarten playong kickball that'd i'd be 24 getting plastered in front of the white house and winning a kickball championship in a young adult drinking league
Well, I have a text in my phone that just says "Scrumtrelescent" from a girl I have in here as "Cheesy Tits", so you figure out how my night was going.
His legs actually look hot in that dress. He might even make a better girl than Josh
Watched an eagle swoop down and eat a rabbit on my walk back from your place, literally too high to handle this right now
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well I walked the wrong way for a little bit and I don't remember if I fell asleep or not but I definitely laid down under the over pass for a while
What procrastination leads to: I have submitted a third of my job applications this week with a BAC that would get me arrested
currently working on a look that screams, "I'm dead inside, but still trying to enjoy the ride"
I guess I asked for the two old strippers numbers at the end of the bar and it turned out to be the bartenders mom and aunt...
Did I turn a man straight...??
Yes!
I swear to god, no guy has been as interested in sticking stuff up my butt as this girl
Randomize
