They should make a Rosetta Stone that allows men to understand what the fuck women are actually trying to say.
hammered. By myself. Accident. Faillll. Snowwwwwy
just saw your exgirlfriend at the mall. her sister is pretty hot.
called that a week into the relationship. like driving off the lot with a 2010 and seeing the 2011 models coming in on the truck.
I just did the math. 30.36% of girls I've slept with have cheated on a significant other while doing it.
We got a 5L jug of wine for 3 Euro. Italy was a good choice.
My booty call just put me down for a reference for her job at the hospital. What am I supposed to say? She gives great bj's?
All I know is I was dancing to Shakira in his alley and I think rubbing my junk on his car door.
Well we were going to compare notes, but all I could remember was throwing up, and all she could remember was kissing, so then we decided to not compare anything.
we watched a porno and made a drinking game out of it. best first date ever.
Well the streak is over, I saw a penis today
I tried to avoid catching feelings but then he took me out to breakfast
He doesn't like Sabbath and that alone is a GIANT red flag. Learn from my experiences and never, I mean NEVER associate with people that hate Black Sabbath and Motörhead.
He tried to do a JoJo pose and wound up breaking his wrist in the process. Truly a story for the ages.
Somebody put William Shatner singing Bohemian Rhapsody on the jukebox, and the whole bar is about to riot.
She's writing hockey erotica again.
Tell her to pick another team besides ours this time.
Randomize
