Report just came out that Tim Tebow is a virgin but I have proof he is not. He's bent Florida State over the last four years in a row.
My dad assaulted a TSA agent this morning. Shut down airport security. Don't tell me that your family is embarrassing.
do you think the kids from 7th heaven are mad that dennis and sweet dee are their half-brother and sister?
That's because you're a slut. A slut fucking a fence.
I'll see ya tonight at your house...and I'm bringing you a special treat that starts with a V and ends with us eventually going to rehab one day.
I found him in bed on a pullout couch with another dude. He had two empty puke buckets and his empty bottle of jagermeister right by his head.
does the girl puking in my garbage belong to you?
My stepdad and I just tag-team hit on a server at McDonald's. This is the man I should have grown up with.
I had very briefly met him a few years ago. My friend was tired of hearing us both complain about being horny. She figured she would fuck two birds with one stone.
Your stories are the best. I feel like you're a spy among the heteros. It's not fair.
Strip clubs it is bday boy. One condition. I am in full custody of your ID. I plan on being in no condition to coordinate rescue operations and we need to keep casualties to a minimum. You cannot be trusted.
Alright goddamnit. Can I bring my pirate hat?
I insist.
Just realized I used a picture of my little sister to holler at a guy, only 3 months old and she's already my wingman.
I think even the taco bell employees judged me
Hahahaha. He sent me a dick snap in the lululemon stockroom. What is life. If this works out, this could benefit everyone....
I've seen too many naked penises for this to be a normal Monday morning
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