I just woke up and shes still asleep next to me with her vibrator inside her and on. Whats normal protocol for this situation?
Look what our sorority has done to us...we're hitting on girls in hopes of getting an awesome little.
There's a skull full of vodka. How bad can it be?
she's a dental assistant. she can get nitrous. kinda looks like a sloppy bucket of fuck. time to take one for the team. NEED SHOTS STAT!!
Tumblr User Tells Story About A ‘Demon Gets Adopted By A Grandma’& It Needs To Be A F**king Movie
He's like Medusa, you can't look directly into his eyes or you'll turn into a slut.
He's basically me if I was an 8-yr-old boy. It's like looking into a pudgy terrifying mirror
I swear to god he's making pineapple onions and cheese. He thinks he's making eggs onions and cheese
The fact that it neither of us came up with the reason of "it's morally and ethically wrong" speaks volumes about this relationship
So somehow today's lecture on the immune system turned into me having to stand up and explain female ejaculation to the class.
20+ Kids Who Probably Didn’t Mean To Draw Hardcore Porn
I wouldn't say I LOVE Pacman. I mean, sure, I'd battle against you in an epic Pacman struggle for blow jobs and glory. But I mean, who wouldn't?
Yeah, first date. First take a pic of him to circulate around for your friends and than have him fill out a short penis questionnaire. Seems completely legit to me.
Binging muscle relaxers because when ur 33 you can no longer SHAKE IT LIKE A POLAROID PICTURE for 2hrs w/o consequences. Fuck you, Age.
he stopped mid makeout and said "can I pray for you?"
National tequila day this year falls on a Monday. I've never been more disappointed in my life.
I just told my bowl "sorry" for putting it down, because I thought I hurt its feelings. omg. I'm high.
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