What I lack in compassion I make up for in lack of compassion
when my professor asked "does anyone know what streches across south america" and a kid in the back row said "my exgirfriends vagina" i knew i was at home.
She literally called herself a shamefully bad decision. Of course I slept with her. Best bad decision ever
im calling her cock vulture from now on
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well at least he is okay. If you call the fetal position in my living room floor "okay"...
get back quick. that 17 year old who peed on your car wants to do shots.
please don't fuck her on my bed i'm too poor for laundry quarters
His car is rigged up like the cash cab how am i supposed to not sleep with him
Because the guy guy doing the drawing either wanted to bone, or wanted us to stop entering the contest. Either way, we got concert tickets so I'm cool with both scenarios.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's not too terrible. You just got a little naked and broke your arm.
She couldn't understand why my walking in on her 70 year old parents ruined any chance of a boner for at least an hour. I think she's too slow for me to fornicate with.
Goddamnit, guys. I got lube all over my kindle.
It's 7:30pm and we've already lost someone and had to run from the cops. What the fuck did you put in the punch?
HAMMERED.. I made a peanut butter and jelly sandwich with toilet paper instead of bread...
You know tonight's gonna be a good night when your already planning on sleeping in a trunk
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