No awkward lesbian experiences without me
This row in front of you is like duck, duck, goose - but eating disorder, eating disorder, failed eating disorder
i dont know what it is, i just found it in my pants.
I let some guy put hot sauce in my asshole for his birthday
no, I didn't make it. Instead, i watched VH1 for... 13 hours? I use the question mark because I was using Flavor Flav's clocks to tell time after the first 3 hours.
how lazy do you have to be to be a fat vegetarian?
Just saw a drunk guy marching down the strip with a garden rake. I feel compelled to follw him
good news. it is gonna rain tomorrow so now I don't have to pay to clean the puke off the side of your car.
Mass Text: Free blowjob to first person to bring me a nacho cheese chalupa.
I didn't take her seriously until she snorted that ramen noodle flavor packet...
ALSO, I NEED TO BORROW A CAT. ASAP
Well. At least he's a gentleman. A gentleman satanist.
I'm sitting here drinking whisky and listening to The Wiggles, I don't need a social life
I don't even remember what dignity looks like anymore. I JUST WANTED TO ROAST SOME POTATOES
I'm still very high. To be blunt. No pun intended.
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