i think 'regret' was last night's theme. i could taste it in my mouth and woke up next to it.
neither the pictures you took nor my hangover explain why there are skittles in my shoe
dont like to call her my roomate, too cordial. i refer to her as the whore that was assigned to live with me
i felt horrible..i wanted to somehow give him his vcard back
that's a non refundable transaction sweetheart
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he said he has something really important to tell me but isn't ready yet. It's either that he loves me or has herpes
I don't think my prof knows we've noticed her No Bra Fridays.
I woke up at 5:47 in the morning to you peeing on my parents bedroom floor. I think we've established that you have a limit .
The gas station was closed so we found old PBR and played Edward Nalgene Hands instead
I rammed pretzels and Jell-O shots down the throats of those I loved.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I drunkenly texted ur dad last night telling him he raised great kids hahahahaha
I'm talking to a corgi on tinder..wtf has my life come to
he's spending the night tonight. if i can walk straight tomorrow i'll be pissed.
I'm going to tell you a beautiful word.
Fellatio.
I have to stop at Sheetz to put my bra back on before I meet you hold on
We couldn't find her anywhere. Finally, I saw her sitting in my bathroom floor spraying hair mouse into her mouth and whispering "I fucking love whipped cream." WHAT DID YOU GIVE HER AND CAN I HAVE SOME?
Randomize