Just passed an anti-circumcision dude with a sign. Handing-out-bibles guy has been officially one-upped.
I told her you were a premature ejaculator. She nodded and said "Really? Wow, how long's he been a Pilot for?"
you are both the best and worst wingman ever.
This titty bar has wifi. I just did FaceTime stage side
I have no valid justification for peeing in your kitchen, but I don't think it's worth breaking up over.
He managed to scream "cowabunga bitch" before he went down on me. Let me know if you still like him.
she left around the point i tried to tie her hair around my dick
oh no, don't get me wrong.. she IS really pretty. If you are in to horses or Sarah Jessica Parker.
Yes. Be the home wrecker you've always dreamed of being.
The point remains that this is the setup for some great stories
Or terrible, horrifying, traumatic experiences
great clearly means different things to us
I will sleep with anyone I have to to make sure you don't get deported
Dude she tried to bite my face off last night, literally. I have never actually felt like a piece of meat until that point in life...
Pssh I just bang a girl in a single person tent. Thats like the back seat of a sedan.
No, and she still hasn't answered me...I get a whole series of text messages about Guatemalan anal bleaching but no fucking answer to my question.
I feel like 20 angels jizzed in my mouth. This cupcake is DELICIOUS!
That man fucks like a champ. The sex was so good I did him again in the morning just to be sure
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