Sex don't cost a thang now that you can buy trojans with meal points.
what is it about summer that misdirects my moral compass so much?
We could sell used underwear with pictures of us wearing them.
sunday morning discovery: something purple, smelly, and sticky my hair. any suggestions?
People Are Arguing Over This Guy’s Petty Reaction To Splitting Lunch With His Co-Worker
rather than putting your name in guys phones, you just texted 90999 to donate $10 to Haiti and then gave it back to them
She begged me for sex again. I felt like I was telling a homeless person I didn't have any change.
I don't remember anything other than how good it felt when I peed my pants.
dude you guys. You can't throw up in the recycling bin. I don't think vomit is recyclable
Are we responsible for the snowmen doing it doggy-style in my front yard?
Girl Logs Into Twitter Only To Find Out Her Dad Is Trending For The Most Outrageous Reason
I bought a 9 dollar purse from payless so if I throw up in it tomorrow, no biggie.
don't pay it forward
I eont pay shit forward. told a stranger to call an abulance and peaced
It's a lost cause. Soon she's gonna get naked, just let nature run its course
My car windows are covered in lube. Happy 4th of July!
I'm resourceful. I forgot we don't have coca cola so now I'm drinking Jack & Dew or Mountain Daniels. Also, I haven't decided on an official name yet for this drink. I'm leaning toward Jack & Dew
Soggy bong water carpet is the worst kind of carpet.