I think it's just because she's got "I'll sleep with anyone with a decent car" written all over her face.
before i die, we are going to oregon and playing oregon trails for real. like putting things in a hat & people will pull out whether they live or die. and they die of fun things like typhoid, dysentary, or hunting accident.
i get tired of guys telling me there married or they have a girlfriend. they act like it concerns or matters to me
Sorry you had to hear me puke. I didn't know I called you. Was it graceful?
Just turned rock'em sock'em robots with my little cousin into a drinking game. Im drinking bourbon hes drinking hot chocolate.
Exactly. wat kind of friend would i be if i even pretended to give a shit about ur problems
I think the world is coming to an end. Earthquakes, huricanes, floods, and now you say you LOVE him. Im building a shelter and going into hiding.
Can you send me a picture of you not naked, my mom wants to see what you look like
He made me cum 4 times, we high fived afterwards and then I proceeded to tell him about this guy I'm dating whilst I made him a bacon sandwich. I think we've finally mastered being friends with benefits.
Never thought I would be taunted by little kids about my walk of shame
Literally just inhaled three cinnamon rolls. Sara is staring. It was inhuman
SOMEONE WITH THE TWITTER HANDLE "METHLAB" FAVORITED THAT PICTURE
I sleep better at night when I win things. I never really weep for others.
If I walk downstairs and Kelly is fucking in the laundry room again I'm gonna die
is it just me or does "lol" kill any sort of vibe while sexting?
Randomize
