It's sad how good I am at giving people diseases
i seriously wanted to pee on her right then.
His dick is longer than my foot and I'm a size 9. I'm literally kicking myself in the vagina
He fucked a girl named Oreo... He deserved syphilis.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
apparently I crawled into someone's bed and demanded they call me 'big dog' before shotgunning a beer
He wants to hookup..at the fair..this is our chance to leave him stranded with no clothes.
4:37 am. You're wearing underwear and carpet skates. Borderline crying. You want to punch Morgan. Have not stopped singing Give Your Heart a Break.
We should have a bouncer at the top of our stairs asking the guys we bring home for ID...
I just realized now that you're pregnant we can't use alcohol as currency
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My poor liver. I drank enough on NYE to sustain an alcohol addiction for the entirety of 2015.
I'm just going to take the mature adult root and ignore him for a bit, and then pretend like I didn't see him jerking off.
Desperate times call for desperate measures. But he promised me no small talk so that was nice
All I remember is pissing by the garage and the next thing I know I'm on fire
I haven’t sent any nudes yet in 2018.
That’s not true...is it?
Honestly his girlfriend says she hates me cause she thinks im trying to get him to cheat on her with me...she should hate me cause i already accomplished that.
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