R and i have drinken 4 bottles od red wine. By ourselfs
YOURE GIVING A BLOW JOB TO THE BOY WHO SAYS "OH SNAP"
So... I just got back from the chiropractor... And he said I have a slight neck injury from head banging too much. Fuck yes.
adderall flavored popcorn. yes we did it and its awesome
i cant talk right now. we are trying to finish our homework so we can play with play-doh
Well his dad was his wingman, so I had to fuck him. I didnt want his dad to think that he was doing a bad job and I was drunk enough to think he was doing a good job.
Score one for dad.
i was giving head the other day and thought of your all penis tastes the same quote and couldnt stop laughing
Sangria Sundays can't keep happening. Even my second grade students know I'm hungover. Benji even gave me his oreos its that bad
You don't understand!!! BACON ROSES!!! Why are you not more excited?!
I found a blow up pig at an adult store. He will have to fuck that on video if he wants anal. Also, I bought a pair of clear high heels. Tell your brother I love him.
Seriously, you just banged the guy that wishes his dog happy birthday on fb. That's fucking adorable!
Can't meet up at the party. Gary was caught by the cops attempting to drop a deuce thru his ex wife's Subaru via sun roof. Details as soon as bail is processed.
you face planting the wall was epic
did you at least save my tooth
There are some people who should not be trusted with a cell phone while drunk. You know your one of them when you call the cops on your own party.
drunkkkkk be here I heart you
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