I made a drinking game out of watching your DUI video, everytime you say " okay, well thats just your opinion"
He hid IN a snowbank for 2 hours waiting for me to come home. This game has to stop before someone dies.
And I'm not sure if that's how you pluralize penis. Never planned on needing to know that in my life.
dude i should have never cleaned my ears out while high. theres no going back.
Winning pick four numbers were just 6969... if I were 18 I could've won 20,000 dollars.
So after I fell off 4 times we concluded I'm not allowed to ride him anymore.
There is a severe lack of banging on that itinerary... I'd like a revision on my desk within the hour
He offered me handsanitizer after a hand job, you can't tell me he's not perfect!
So please don't worry, but I need some help getting blood out of my drywall so I can get my security deposit back. I would not ask if the need was not great.
The important thing is that she is gone, presumably back to the depths of hell from whence she came.
How do you explain to your kids that you met their mother well you were giving her a gynecological exam??
Just for the record, I did not have sex in your bed. Happy 4th of July.
Your the only girl I know that carries a $1100 purse with tater tots inside
You have no idea how awkward it is fucking someone with the same name as your dog
"I mean like shit happens" should never be an excuse for anything
Randomize
