I woke up and my panties were thumbtacked to his wall. Out of my reach.
I just figured it out. Meghan has the same smile as Sylvester Stallone.
As a pleasant surprise..I woke to find a Burrito and Bottle of Gatorade .....Merry XMAS to ME
He's a collector of sorts
Any cool stuff?
You should see the collection of booggers in the carpet next to his desk
This soccer player girl is eating this banana WAY to slow. Too early for penis shaped foods.
His roomates just started party boying me. He stood there with the look of horror on his face.
This is the last weekend of getting drunk and having sex all nite with the plumber. I'm exhausted all weekend and I'm never going to finish the remodel at this rate
i woke up next to a ladle and a packet of chocolate biscuits that my face had melted into one giant biscuit.
by "whatever happens, happens" i meant "we are totally hooking up again on tuesday." i thought that was obvious.
I can't even look at my running shoes. I swear I drank more in the last 2 days than the last 6 months combined
I tried to make friends with the geese living behind Hughes. They didn't really like that idea.
Are you high?
The van in front of me contains people having SEX. I am in full view of a SEX VAN.
In that state of mind I managed to bounce back from getting hit by a golf cart and convince an investigations officer that I was okay to go into the game.
So...I maybe walked across campus last night with my life size Joe Biden cut out.
Unless it has to do with ramen, goldfish, cheese, or rugby, don't talk to me.
Randomize