oh right, i forgot that not everyone has a go-to blowjob
i left him drunk and in the fetal postion in the shower.
was the water running?
yeah but he said he knows how to swim
at least franzia made me throw up pretty colors.
I woke up wearing nothing but 7 partially eaten candy necklaces. Only one was around my neck. Don't even try to tell me I don't need plan B.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just had to explain to a senior manager why I had duct tape residue on my wrist and hand. This weekend was a success.
I have a feeling that watching gay porn with you was the reason I was dancing in a hurricane of floating dicks in my dream last night.
second attempt at shower sex: failed after the water turned orange bc of a fire up the street. this is just not meant to be
Either you got hacked or we need to have a serious discussion about sending penis enlargement emails to your straight friends and why you shouldn't. It sends the wrong message.
Only Tommy would bring a stripper pole to a bonfire
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He thought he was ordering for the whole party so when he came back with thirty burritos and four of us were left, he wasn't happy
I'm pathetic. I'm eating cream puffs in the bath and crying a little.
Its official. The summoning powers of my vagina are unmatched by anything in this world
A girl showed up in my tinder and I have it set to only men... I super liked her because I need a lesbian experience
So, I just found out Ireland, is #1 in binge drinking. I know its Sunday but this one is for America.
I have a mild substance abuse problem, but I'm still a functioning member of society. America.
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