there's something so ridiculous to me about watching someone with glasses exercising. it's like watching a whore studying in the library. stop trying to be someone you're not.
He has been begging me for a Bj but doesnt want to get mono
How is he gunna get mono? is he gunna suck on his dick after you?
For future reference, a lint roller appears to be the easiest way to get glitter out of a beard.
I'm sorry you missed class, the topic today is copy and paste. I'm not even kidding.
facebook friend requested him the morning after while he was still asleep in my bed, a whole new level of creeper even for me
I apologize in advance for attempting to drunkenly hookup with your sister
She kept chasing him yelling thief, because he drank some of her drink. That was at 8, it got worse.
No she stopped screaming. Now she's eating popcorn. Off a plate. With a spoon.
All I remember is mattress sliding down the stairs while giving him a blow-job. Sorry you had to witness the incident.
don't forget friday is see who can get the most free drinks at the gay bar contest. winner gets $50
STD scares really help you understand the whole six degrees of separation thing...
I woke up in a lawn chair by the lake to some man revving his boat motor at me.
That's like a fucking falcon or some shit. I don't know birds but I know that is not a bird you fuck with.
What's the tour de bar? Is that a thing, or is it just what you call Saturdays?
He's not put together enough to have that big of a dick
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