Forget abc fam drinking games. Take a shot everytime Tyra says I and you'll be dead by the first commercial
Theyr drawing diagrams to try to explain to me how high they are
you told all the 17 year old girls at the party that your mating call was "I glitter in the sun"
We aren't going to mix hockey and sex texts tonight.
I totally agree. all sexting is on hold till after the games over.
Playoffs. This shit is serious.
no. i just ate a whole thing of hot dogs. me and regret are sleepng alone tonigh.
pretty sure I offered to blow her dad. she's not speaking to me & he won't stop winking at me.
He made me a period mix..should I back out now?
during a bj, his alarm went off and he said "At the buzzer"
My eyes feel like they're throwing up and I am the only human on campus
Shame?!? Shame only comes from getting naked in front of strangers and it not being awesome
Ever walked into a basement full of 10 guys jerking it to a live stripper? Cause I have. Always confirm the address of a house party. Always.
Did I fall on/off the boat yesterday? Cuz my right leg looks and feels like if it got hit by shrapnel.
His idea of a night out is drinking beer in the driveway. He's been on house arrest too long
In my defense I didn't know there was concrete on the other side of that fence when I tossed him over it.
You're both fucking idiots and this is why I should never let you two drink alone.
Ooooh no. Jesus take the wheel, or Moses. SOMEBODY TAKE THE WHEEL
Randomize
