Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

Sorry sld415 hasn't picked any favorites yet.

ADVERTISEMENT

(612): View more from Minnesota

On my way home i need to take a massive dump and couldn't wait.

Fav 2 849 2016
share tweet
(413): View more from Massachusetts

I just sold weed to a guy holding a baby...does this make me a bad person?

Fav 90 1786 3888
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(310): View more from California

I will give you vagina for bag of have'a corn chips.

Fav 15 1856 3214
share tweet
(720): View more from Colorado

The plus side of allergy season is that after our weekend coke binge my runny nose fits right in.

Fav 34 2228 5505
share tweet
(310): View more from California

He kissed my cheek and I could smell it the whole way home like shit

Fav 17 986 6000
share tweet
(717): View more from Pennsylvania

got so drunk i was kicked out of my own birthday party and tried taking a bottle of vodka with me

Fav 6 4357 1272
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(989): View more from Michigan

there's sperm and chicken noodle soup everywhere

Fav 12 1456 3124
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(630): View more from Illinois

Couldn't find my swimsuit top anywhere this morning but finally found it in the skimmer of the pool so thats how my night apparently went

Fav 2 895 548
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(716): View more from New York

Last night you were prentending to be a broom stick...you were laying on the floor and humming the Harry potter song.

Fav 1 50 9
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT