I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
She was lying the whole time!
She was a great actress
I was a great dumbass
I guess i tried to text 911 last night with "someone stole my bong." Thank god that doesn't work...
and if it starts getting weird im just going to tell him i used to be a man
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
first off, his name is dougie. strike one.
Two girls are doing the worm relatively well on the bar floor after the fact I just saw one puke in the trash
Standing on the street at 6am in Hong Kong drinking beer. Watching all the hookers do the walk of shame from our hotel. How did I get here? Maybe all my bad choices in my life were really good ones?
The bartender said he wanted to turn you gay, and we got free shots the rest of the night
Well there is another shower in Nov. So I have three months to figure out how to get some drunk space fucking. May need some of your mead
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's just not a Friday night unless I'm getting propositioned by a guy in a wheelchair via Facebook messenger...
Your mother liked my album on facebook that's only filled with drunk pictures. I don't know what to feel about this
"I'm not drinking any more tonight." As I dipped my quesadilla in a shot of tequila....then eats it
As long as you keep bringing fries home, i'll keep being naked when you get home
carb up bitch. we're drinking with football players.
Did I tell you he put a lobster carcass on his dick?
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