note to self: Never ask your girlfriend to have a 3some with your ex...
I just had sex in a moon bounce. It is all down hill from here.
suddenly, hermaphrodite night sounds like a really bad idea
What's the point of being healthy if people still don't want to fuck you?
Sometimes i wish my penis was detachable that way i could take it off sometimes so i wouldnt get into these situations
I just sent a friend request to someone saying that i was the girl he shared a fifth of jager with last week. Thats something special. He better accept.
I'm using her two yr old as a arm rest while I attempt to feel her up. Somehow she is allowing it. How this transitions to sex should be interesting.
I have a LOT of reasons to worry about radical feminists taking my lady balls, frankly. A lot.
Well, that was my first dog walk of shame. Nothing says "I've got my life together" like an inside out shirt and a baggie full of dog shit.
I put ketchup in a girls hair last night. I need a sorry balloon
Saw 2 lesbians fist fighting outside the bar tonight. I was startled yet slightly turned on
If the ex isent in town and im crying under a table somewhere because of it can we go to a drag show or something
he was high. i was rolling face. we were both wearing grateful dead t shirts. at that point it's like we had no choice but to fuck
I just realized it's officially fall..I had sex while watching Halloween
The air I exhale reeks of whiskey and bad decisions
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