with your own penis?
I am so gay it hurts my loins. Going to see She's Just Not That Into You... again. Ohhh my goodness.
What's the politest way to tell someone that you're only interested in them when they're naked, and even then it's just like a passing "meh?"
Oh and ps....i was sleeping soundly until i woke up by the sound of amy on the phone with her mom sobbing hysterically because she can't stop having the shits.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so high. i feel like my whole body is a boner
gonna sleep on the stairs... to drunk to keep going up, way to drunk to go down, gonna find a comfy spot right here... its safer that way
He wouldnt stop screaming that he wanted a trashcan WITH a lid. Whats so necassary about a lid
i want you to know that after i type the word "your" , vagina is next on my auto correct text
Drunk me forgot I'm not an 18yr old raver anymore. Adult me is now in pain.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Happiness is watching your asshole boss' police DUI video.
scratch that I can tell you where she is shes drunk on a beach somewhere being a penis slayer
If you put those two in a room together it'd be like a Taylor Swift fantasy and an Adele nightmare just licking faces
I need to start using my boobs for good instead of weed. Although really they're kind of the same thing
Update - might be back in your neighbor's good graces. She liked the framed photo I gave her of me on the tractor with my business out.
It's only 3 AM. There's still time to get arrested today.
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