just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
Just figured out how to smoke weed with a toaster.
i hate when i ask a girl what she's being for halloween and the first word isn't "slutty"
Just got the American Express annual summary for 2009. The amount of bars we visited last year is impressive.
I've thrown up so many times in the third floor bathroom of Baldwin that they should probably just go ahead and name it after me.
There's an australian, my relationship has no hope.
I had to throw a towel over the bottles cuz it hurts to look at them
allie, at least he made an effort and braided his goatee.
surprisingly organic peanut butter is not the best chaser
Let's get weird.
It's 10 am...
I'm assuming that means you're not busy...
I folded my dollar bills into mustaches in preparation for our trip to the strip club
So when he asked me to go on a date tonight, I didn't think the words "have you tried a suppository" would be part of the evening.
Is it bad I use my AA meeting to hookup with guys?
My boss spotted an injured PIGEON outside the front door this morning (at 3:30am) and requested that I catch it and take it to the vet. Catch it with what! Take it where!These requests have gone too far...
Yeah. I got a Tetnus shot then partied like it was 1999.
Randomize
