Fuck. sleeping in my sisters room again I heard zombie noises outside my window
In hindsight, i should have predicted that a drink called the 'rocky mountain bear fucker' would not end in a pleasant experience
were with a gay guy with a minnesota accent. think about how funny that sounds.
just watched an entire episode so you think you can dance for head. so wasn't worth it
She was so happy she found her sunglasses, that she blew me. Im now randomly hiding things of hers in hopes she'll find them and I'll get a repeat performance.
hes totally cute, too bad i slept with his father
I have to verbally tell you. He looks good on paper...but he totally fails in person. Like communism.
We found you in the middle of the road chucking gravel because "the house was too far away".
Well just watched a guy puke in a trash can then proceed to pick pizza outta said trash can and eat it
antibiotics and champagne: breakfast of champions
Part of me really wants this picture, but the other part of me knows if he is really this drunk, he could be sodomizing a lamp and not know it
It's cool dude. The dank is in the form of premade smores with honey grahm crackers, marshmallow cream and 420 brand choc. bars. NV weed laws have nothing on me.
If blow jobs were a super power she'd be in the Justice League.
Woke up with a $50 attached to my penis with a rubber band..
Sweet. Tell little Richard to buy us a sack and a pizza.
When I went to pick up Adam from the train station, I found him passed out, covered in gold paint and wrapped in a red blanket. someone had glued a gaudy green rhinestone to his forehead. He looked homeless.
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