yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
Holy shit bill nye is being consulted as an expert on cnn and hes credited as the science guy. What the fuck is the world coming to?
i really appreciated the lovely drunk rendition of whitney houstan's "i wanna dance with somebody" you left on my voicemail.
Does anyone know who that girl who fell backwards and broke the shoe rack with her head was?
The night was going well until I found tufts of my hair in the freezer. Then I got nervous
we tried to steal a tractor last night. you should have come out.
I'm still tasting pancake mix. I think this may actually be a serious medical problem...
please, i've had weekends with less dignity than this.
One minute you were celebrating, the next you were bleeding all over your Nikes.
I'm sorry, the person you're trying to reach is WAYYY too high to deal with this right now.
just had to get on my knees to snort an addy off the little sink at the daycare. teacher of the year!
Right in the middle of our simultaneous orgasms, he shouted "HAPPY NEW YEAR" ruining the intimacy
We peed on a building I think...like a building in downtown...not out of view of anyone.
Just left the ER. Only good thing... my hot ass nurse Carlos stripped me.
God works in mysterious ways.
Before making travel and hotel reservations to meet your "affair" for the first time, consult your menstrual calendar! $633 wasted!
Randomize
