so while trying to be a healthier drunk i discovered that putting airborne in natty is not an advisable decision
They were so loud I wrote them a sex critique and taped it to his door.
I only knew it was midnight because i got happy new years texts while i puked outside
he fucked me so hard my future children felt it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Her husband keeps getting drunk and making out with me. Good news is I found the strep carrier. Bad news is have strep again.
she was using bread to soak up the vodka off the floor then proceeded to eat it.
Is it cum slut, cumslut or cum-slut? Sexting, plz advise ASAP
I just ditched my friends to hang out with the chilis restaurant crew...one of these girls better have daddy issues
She kept telling me to calm down. I was on the floor with my eyes shut, not moving. In levels of calm I was one step above coma patient
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It would be like if I said I had the cure for cancer and my explanation was I like turtles.
She said if her future children dont have blue eyes she wont love them
I think I'm getting sponsored by the Mexican Drug Cartel for the start of my poker career. It was an interesting night at the bar. One word, Vegas.
He said I gave him the best head he's ever had and I bowed. I BOWED.
All I remember is me taking my automatic nerf gun getting on top of him and saying..."look whos in control now!"
I bonged champagne. And did keg stands. What in the actual fuck am I doing with my life?
Randomize