I sk at the spereo and my dad gave me and all access pass
what???
AN ALL ACCESS PASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
i am watching brooke knows best right now and hulk is totally dating his daughter's look a like. it is gross and disturbing.
the most pressuring question is, why are you watching brooke knows best?.
There is somethin about your sexuality that makes my dick do jumping jacks when I see you
i never realize how drunk i am until i start using people as human stripper poles
Ways to know you did something wrong: you sugar-coated it for your therapist.
The only comparison I have for the iPhone is that it's like youre constantly getting a blow job
After four attempts, his condom would not flush. I had to remove it with salad tongs.
Cavemen vs astronauts. weapons to be determined. Who would win?
How do you feel? I threw up in a towel. Also, a lot of other things.
I am making it a rule that only people I am comfortable around enough to not have to put a bra on are allowed for Sunday funday. I think that's a good rule for someone who started drinking alone at noon while everyone else here sipped their coffee.
Im fairly sure two chicks roofied me last night. Suckers. I love free drugs.
When we pulled over so you could pee, you made us stand over you and "make a roof"
An "unreasonable amount of ejaculate" isn't a reason to be angry at me.
It's almost like he's actually taking my commentary and criticism to heart, but simultaneously succumbing to some primal urge to wear less clothing each time.
Some Romanian guy at work just told me "you come my house, we drink beer and you come make fuck with my sister"
If he's not there watching you go for it. It's been a while bro.
Randomize
