We George Forman grilled some girls phone last night.
its a saturday night. im home alone watching legally blonde, eating week old birthday cake and drinking milk out of the carton. so yeah im doing real well
You say "I'm in class" like it matters... I'm getting a little tired of having to smoke by myself at 4:20 because you're in class.
When I finally got there you were bleeding all over and you just kept saying over and over that the dog was your only friend at the party.
I am in macy's and just straight up heard an old lady taking a crap in her depends.
I just hit the bong during the whole bday song then blew the candles out with my exhale.
Are you still goin to the xmas party?
Yaaaa why?
Jus making sure i will have nice people i know to put a blanket over me when i pass out in the field .
Hot dogs and hydrocodine is NOT the combo of champions
That BJ in the bathroom was definitely worth the $20 cover.
with great strapon comes great responsibility.
Not at all! I'll let your potential employer know you have a huge dick
Does she know she is talking to people who slam shots of fireball and chase it with vodka?
My liver is screaming fuck you right now.
sex on a trampoline, in the rain, on ecstasy, just thought you should know.
Because you put the dick in ridiculously amazing boyfriend. And you deserve to have nice things happen to your penis. That's why.
Randomize