Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
She forgot my birthday again. How do you forget something that came out of your vagina???
I also would have accepted most things ending in "job", erotic favors, and food.
Its become more of a routine.. Whenever I get done eating and have left overs I just take it over to his house and throw it all over the walls and windows. Pay backs a bitch ehhhh
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Tonight when I'm getting a bj from a stripper I'm gonna imagine it's you bobbing down there
Don't remember shit. It was only until I saw the glaze on my forearm that I knew you drove to get donuts last night. I also spent 20$ there apparently
I just threw up on the floor. And we're gonna fuck on the beer pong table, so keep everyone upstairs.
You were so high you insisted on spoon feeding me your KFC bowl while I was driving.
Was who let the dogs out playing?
Ya. You started barking when it ended
Given everything we have talked about, is it wrong to ask you to be faithful to me, despite still dating him?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
the bride at the wedding we just crashed said we can stay only if we strip for her. You need to get down here
Hey remember that time you called a woman a "man in a dress" and then threw up in a drinking fountain?
Look, all I can tell ya is I want to drink wine out of a bottle while you eat me. It would be the most fantastic end to finals week. Maybe ever.
So why are your hands bright blue and have you seen my roommate.
Both questions will answer each other.
If you fuck up my birthday by dying I will kick your fucking corpse.
I figured it out! There's blood on the kitchen floor because I fell into the dishwasher. And there's a face dent. And it doesn't work.
Yea.....I saw that happen.
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