Playing a game in life called "how far can I make a man travel for a booty call"
Yeah he gave the rest of the brownies to the bouncer that took his fake
When you guys came back from the bar, I thought everyone was a T-Rex - Thats why i was hiding under the table. Never doing shrooms with Drunk people again
Safe to say I relapsed into my old chatroulette drunk flashing days.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was high and he had on a gorilla suit. Of course I had to take a picture with him
Your a disgrace to smokers everywhere
You need to fuck him. The man has his own Wikipedia.
I shall welcome him into my body with an open liver and completely lay down all chance of resistance. Sweet Zeus, please take me to Mt. Olympus and share all that is divine. I promise, the secrets will be safe with me
I did not get laid last night bc my condoms were too small. I'm allowed to be dreary
Do you think Brian would let me smoke while we fuck? I'm not sure ill survive exams without a constant nicotine intake
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Note to self. The tub labelled "not water" does not contain water.
We should. Taco Bell definitely gives me the shits though.
It's girls night. No shame, just febreeze
fuck whipped cream. I'd eat vegetables off those abs
Would seriously like to slash his tires but then I feel like I'd have to deal with him longer.
Listen, I booty called my boss last night from the company phone. I may need to brush up my resume.
I remember you banged her while I was dying on your couch, so good call
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