he shaved USA in his pubs
dont touch anything in my room. If its phallus shaped, i can almost guarantee its been in my vagina.
Operation Purity has been aborted
Going stoned out of mind to my sociology exam because it's really just a pizza party. I love community college.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Expect nothing less than me teaching them how to do shots and put condoms on
DR UNK TOWN USA
TEAM USA GO AMERICA
My garbage can has nothing in it besides condoms and candy wrappers. That's good garbage.
Him naked in my bed with a bottle of vodka in one hand, a pipe in the other, and a rose in his mouth.
So apparently I was a completely different person lastnight, one who drinks scotch and makes out with 55 year old men who look like inspector gadget
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Like these jerks could have told me it wasn't a video call, I wouldn't have put on pants.
A guy I hooked up with YEARS ago just endorsed me on LinkedIn for "customer service".
I wonder whether Megan will forgive me if i have phone sex in her attic
Also I literally googled "how to fold socks" so that's how my day is going. How's yours?
I swear to god, I'm like....the Jedi master of dick.
I sharted in court today and had to sit on it for about three and a half hours.
Randomize