I've walk of shamed through this apartment complex so many times, I think people think I live here.
Seriously. You just grinded your ass all over the heisman trophy's dick. I want you to think about that.
You told him that your vagina was the "King Crab" of all vagina's.
Yes, I am about to pass out on my beanbag with a mason jar of wine. Welcome to the south freshmen.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The melted ice in my drinks tonight is probably the most water I've had in like 3 days accumulated.
why is there a broken handcuff locked to the ceiling fan
So my nipple piercings were only $20 because it's breast cancer awareness month. Fuck yes!
Don't you judge us. Sockets make ideal bowls
Apparently my Ambien addled brain last night actually did decide to go ahead and photoshop you into various animal and human molesting scenarios. That's a hell of a thing to wake up to.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All of my exes are either overweight and neckbearded or dead. Someone out there is looking out for me.
just woke up on the floor of my shower...it was still runnning
Drink. Fuck. Waffle House. Repeat.
I found condoms in the back yard from you and your boyfriend. My house isnt a motel
He talked me out going to the bar. No one ever talks me out going to the bar..this is fucking love.
don't think less of me for this, but i'm pretty sure he did a line off my boob last night.
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