Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
Oh, and for future reference, telling a guy that your ass is too tight for anal is like painting a bullseye on it.
like when he blacked out and we found him in the garden eating your tomatoes off the vine
You're right. Single life welcomed me back with open arms. It's like it knew it wasnt going to be long when I left.
he may be homeless but his dick however is not... anymore.
I'm never waking up next to someone after sex again. It's alllll downhill from there.
You came over, called every girl Comrade Heather, and then declared that you were an Eagle, and we were your young.
So all in all, a good night.
HEY. That drawer full of booze in my dorm room also has aspirin and Tums in it. So don't tell me I don't care about health.
When she sees your dick for the first time, tell her it glows blue when orcs are close
No matter how drunk I am or how drunk I'll ever be I love you
The entire state will know me by my boobs.
yeah I had to wear a fucking diaper from work home so I didn't get the shitty squirts all over my cars seats it was fucked
I SWEAR TO GOD IF SHE FUCKS WITH OUR GOLD GENE POOL
After tacos, we're chasing women.
Hey! Happy Birthday! Could you do me a favor and bring my underwear to the bar?
Randomize
