Wow, you were right... Weed does start conversations
once he started yelling at me in latin, i wasn't sure what we were fighting about anymore...
you started crying because you didn't get to wear your rainboots this week so i turned on the shower and let you jump around in it
youre the best friend ever
The frequency that you give me blue balls couldn't be healthy.
I just want to go some place where I can have a nice night. Grind on men who speak no English, make out with a girl, and not feel judged.
i feel this will be the best possible way to start a friendship. By breaking into his house.
Omg. Some dude is jacking off in Kelly's bathroom.
You should kill a bro for me and drag his carcass home so I can study him.
my roommate just said she thinks she got a flashback or some memory of me getting hit by a car.
I am at Brians in a pirate costume, what the hell am I thinking
Maybe I'm nitpicking, but that looked more like how one would jerk off an elephant than it did playing air guitar.
This guy has a theme song for the joints he rolls
Hey, before I head out, whats your policy on casual drug use and one night stands?
So you're willing to shred any respect that you had for your body on some random chick who's only looking for sex? That's the worst thing I've ever heard.
I mean, it won't be 100% meaningless, I know her middle name.
I'm fine. Heading home now...crying. Michael Bolton totally understands me!
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