when she said she would show you her other bow, she ment she wanted you to bend her over and see the tattoo on her lower back you idiot
This is ridiculous. It's like playing possible STD Clue, and I don't want to be the winner.
He could tell i had a fever by feeling my tits. He gets docter of the year.
By the way, we're gonna have to get a new rug for the livingroom i kinda started ours on fire...
He just tagged everyone he's slept with this year in a 'memories of 2011' tweet
I am far too hungover to deal with the fact I can hear you masturbating in the bathroom.
Currently getting "blaow" buzzed into my pubes. How's your thursday?
I fucking hate you. Some slutty looking drunk chick backed her ass up across the bar and started grinding on you. You ignored her because you didn't want to share you drink
I care about my drink far more than her feelings
Part of my treatment is getting high and having sex with 22 year olds. I have a prescription!
I've grown it out to 70s proportions. I'm calling it my chastity pelt.
Do you think they'll deliver pizza to my mouth
Can you tell dad to stop liking and sharing porn on FB again?
I want you more than I want a burrito.
I'm not as filling.
I can't open my mouth wide enough to make full use of this snapchate update
Is it rude to say "I hate you because you live inside Hillary Clinton's asshole"?
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