last night we were having sex and i didn't care if i got off. i was just holding up my hand behind his head so i could look at my new ring. i think he knew.
Define 'illegal'. Your idea of it and my idea are in separate universes.
Drunk in my research methods class at 9:30 in the morning. We should do a quantitative analysis of my mimosa consumption.
I am both scared and jealous.
All I know is he mentioned whips, leather cuffs, and a riding crop. It's like Halloween, Christmas, and My birthday all in one. a 5 year old couldn't even possibly be this excited.
They made out. Sounded like hippos drinking water
You come home the day the world is supposed to end. Well played Mayans.
So high I started thinking my desktop picture of a cat was too erotic for the workplace.
Got drunk and passed out flintstone vitamins to everyone at the bar. I'm just so god damn motherly
And then he said, "let's have sex and I'll send you home with enchiladas."
Guess who's the proud owner of her very own foxtail butt plug!!
On a scale of 0 to Thanksgiving, there is no amount of food that fights against tequila.
Cum just came out of my nose. That is all.
Don't come up here. Strippers r crying.
Do u think the bouncer will let me in with a giant stuffed snake?
look, bitch. one day when everyone i care about deserts me for my severe moral depravity, you're going to be the only one i have.
i can't wait.
Randomize
